Are you guilty of letting “busy” be the new “fine” when asked “How are you?”

I am.

This is a call to action, a plea, to military spouses everywhere to let go of the busy and to focus on what you value most, to take care of yourself, and to stop competing with others for the title of busiest. We all have the same 24 hours. Let’s figure out how to use them in a healthy way so we can thrive.

Here’s a good place to start:

Read A Helpful Guide to Becoming Unbusy by Becoming Minimalist’s Joshua Becker. As military spouses, a lot of times we get “voluntold” to do things. But, you could start by looking at your current commitments and seeing if there’s anything you could cut out. Next time you move, perhaps you can look at your opportunities with a new perspective.
Watch Jeff Shinabarger three-minute video that was mentioned in the above guide. I was so impressed with the profoundness of the video that I immediately put the book, More or Less: Choosing a Lifestyle of Excessive Generosity on my reading list.

Our military lives are full of opportunities. Some of those opportunities are welcomed and others are not. It’s up to us, as military families, to sort through and choose what is in line with what we value. Sometimes I think we try to overcompensate for missed chances, loneliness, and our nomadic ways.

Have I overcompensated for my daughter and enrolled her in several activities so the heartbreak of saying goodbye to her friends twice in one year would be less devastating? Probably. Have I overscheduled for fear of what constant change will do to her academically? Most likely.

And as spouses, what would happen if our schedules weren’t filled to the brim? What kind of unpleasantness would we uncover?

I don’t know about you, but it is difficult to be unbusy. Maybe it shouldn’t be. One thing I can say for sure is that I’m making a sincere effort to never say “busy” when you ask me how I am. Instead, I want to say that I had a full day, working at a job I love, volunteering for a cause I believe in, loving my body with nutritious foods and activities, and spending undistracted time with my family.

May it be so.

How to Stop the Glorification of Busy